Monday, March 26, 2007

Standing Ovation

Gather around children. Amanda's got a serious rant on today. This past week I went to see three live theatre productions. Only one of these productions was less than 3 hours long. My ass? She does not thank you.

Now these productions were of varying quality, ranging from the extremely poor to the kinda weird but very captivating to the pretty good but kinda long. Now I know that my opinion about theatre doesn't matter more than anyone elses (except Kirsten's), wait. My opinion about theatre does matter more than some. Why? Because I see a lot of fucking theatre. Now, whether or not something is to my taste or your taste is up for grabs...but the basics? I know the basics.

I'm veering away from the point here. Let me bring it back around. Let's get to what we're really here to talk about today. What's on the minds and in the hearts of theatre buffs the world over.

The standing ovation.

Wikipedia has this to say about the standing ovation:
A standing ovation is a form of applause where members of a seated audience stand up while applauding. This action is done on special occasions by an audience to show their approval and is done after extraordinary performances of particularly high acclaim.

Extraordinary. You heard it here first folks. Now please follow this through to it's logical conclusion. You stand for a performance that makes an impact, a performance that is unforgettable, a performance that moves you.

It is inappropriate...nay, it is wrong to stand because:
a) you feel obligated
b) you know the lead actor
c) you directed the play
d) you are glad it's over

I assume that was what was going on this week, because neither of the two shows I saw that received standing ovations deserved them.

Oh yeah, that's right. I'm vocalizing my opinion that shitty theatre and only pretty good theatre don't deserve your standing ovations. What are you going to do about it? Nothing of course.

Do you think the world would be a better place if we are nicer to each other? Well you're wrong. It'd be a fucking boring place.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

A Tribute

As per usual, everything good I find on the internet I find because Meganude tells me about it. This is only one of the many excellent reasons to have 'Nude as a friend. She's all young and shit so she's all up on what's hip and happening on the web. Or at least I hope she is because I certainly don't know what's going on and am blindly following her lead.

My latest obsession: food blogs. I have perused quite a few and have landed on Smitten Kitchen as my absolute fav. I love this woman. How does she have time to do all this cooking and photographing and blogging in addition to her full-time job???? That remains a mystery to me. A crazy thing has happened though...she has inspired me to cook. I know, it's crazy! I should have told you to sit down before I revealed that. No one was more shocked than me.

Here was my first attempt, it was a tasty pasta and roasted tomato thingy that was both quick to make and totally delish. Yum! There is sure to be repeat occurances of this one! I'm always on the hunt for tasty, quick, meatless dishes that fill me up. The only downside? The pasta was a bit clumpy, I think I did it in too small of a pot. I even made my own bread crumbs instead of using packaged ones. She was right, it tasted better and was super easy to do.

This was followed by a desire to make a good homemade mac n' cheese. In the end, this mac and cheese was pretty tasty but I was incapable of eating an entire bowl of it. I could feel my arteries clogging as I attempted it. Soooooooo very cheesy. I recomend this as a side dish!

And of course, always on the hunt for the perfect chocolate cookie recipe I tried out these. Extremely good was my verdict. Now the real question is...if I wanted chocolate chip cookies to be more chippy, why didn't I just add more chips? This recipe calls for 2 cups of chips (most recipes call for 1 cup). Sheer genius. Soft, chewy and oh-so-chocolately. I may have to go make some right now actually...

Also made but too poorly photographed to be viewed: Vodka Cream Penne which I liked better as leftovers the next day (the taste mellowed out a bit), and Banana Bread which was so widely loved and admired (well, does my hubby and my co-worker constitute a wide audience?) that it has replaced my current BB recipe.

So there you have it, my tribute to Smitten Kitchen. The woman who has made me actually want to bake bread...without an appliance to help me!

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Rapidly Approaching 30

Reasons why I would be a good Mom:
- I always know where stuff is, even if it's been put back in the wrong place
- I'm very bossy
- I bake cookies

Reasons why I wouldn't be a good Mom:
- kids kinda freak me out
- kids can be kinda boring after about 30 minutes
- I like being able to fall dead asleep in less than 5 mintues and staying that way for 9 hours

This came to mind becuase I freaked Megan out last night with another "I'm pregnant.....ha!" scares. The first time I did it to her she reacted horribly and since then has apparently been working on a more appropriate (re: happy) response.

Anyways, I'm always on the fence about the whole kids issue so I figured I should approach it Gilmore Girl's style with a classic Pro/Con list.

Right now I'm working on two lists, the "would I be a good Mom" list and the "do I want to have children" list. Both are equally important I think.

Can you tell that I'm rapidly approaching 30?

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Ever So Scholarly

Last night I attended one in a series of much-lauded lectures on Shakespeare. Yes, yes, I know it makes me look ever so scholarly to be attending lectures. I'd heard so much positive buzz about the lecturer and I've been hankering to get back on my project of reading the entire works of William Shakespeare (I think I'll do a less prolific playwright next).

Anyways, as it turns out I had some major deja vu when I found myself nodding off halfway through said lecture. The seats were comfy with nice high backs, the room was warm and cozy and the dude on stage was like, a thousand years old. I'm sure he's a nice chap but he's not exactly a captivating speaker.

In the end I think that both Mr. Rose and myself were a bit bored. I theorize that it was boring because I'm so familiar with the Scottish play and perhaps I should give it a go with a play I'm less familiar with. That way the whole explaining the plot bit won't be so dull.

Ummmmm....yeah. Last week was soooo very long and yet nothing of real note happened. Aside from the stir and dunk which was moving and life-changing. If by life-changing I mean that I can't seem to burn that image out of my mind. Dear god.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

A Terrible Networker

I'm a terrible networker. Of course I have always known this to be the case but I am always somehow hoping that secretly, magically I will have morphed into a wonderful networker overnight.

This never happens of course. Instead I find myself adrift and awkward at any number of events. I cling, cling desperately to any familiar face...or in this case, Megan. I have nothing to say to these people. After introductions where do I go? And why are they not armed with dozens of dazzling conversation topics?

My worst moment was attempting to converse with some lady from a PR firm. Once we'd covered who we all were a dead and emtpy silence descended upon the "conversation". I must say, the 'Nude wasn't a lot of help either. I expect more pizazz and sparkle from my younger collegues, flash your boobs, troll for job prospects, anything!! 2 mintues of bad "conversation" and awkward silence later I nearly died of relief when she left to get a bevvy.

I think I need a new industry or profession.