Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Get it Together, College-Aged Men

So, I'm casually reading this article how french kissing increases risk of transmission for HPV and it throws out this stat:

"For the 28 percent of college-aged men who reported never having performed oral sex, having at least 10 lifetime or at least five recent open-mouthed kissing partners was associated with a significantly higher risk of developing oral HPV infection."

Hold up there. 28% of the 210 college-aged men in this study have never performed oral sex?! Um, dudes, what's up with that?

Now I'm sure that one or two of the women those men have been with were of the 'oh, my vagina's so gross' camp. Or stupid girls as I like to call them. Because while your va-jay-jay might not actually resemble a beautiful rose, it's not gross. (assumption: regular bathing)

No, most of those guys are in the 'ugh, eating pussy is so gross' camp. Douchebags as I like to call them.

Sterling has some really elaborate theories about tribes and who is accepted and what it takes to reach certain levels of hierarchy in a tribe. I'm not sure exactly how sexual performance fits into that though.

In my opinion oral sex is far more important than status in the tribe, money, good looks, you name it. Because while good looks and money can be fleeting, good oral sex lasts forever.

So I plead with you, college aged men who participate in HPV studies, for the sake of college aged women (and high school aged girls) everywhere, please reconsider your stance on oral sex.

Because oral sex should be a right, not a privilege.


Meg said...

What? I'd like to see a comparable stat on the number of college-aged women who have never performed oral sex.

Actually, I'd like to see the comparison of high-school aged men and women. Though it squicks me out a bit to think of teenagers having sex, they do it. And if I recall, there was a lot of pressure for girls in my day to give head, but I can't think of one single instance where a teenage guy was pressured into performing oral sex.

But seriously. Oral sex? Like good communication, that's a two-way street.

Paper Bag Princess said...

I didn't even know that there was an oral form of HPV. Is that bad?? I'm really not up on my STI lit and if I'm honest I don't want to be! Oh, but I least I know that they're called STIs now and not STDs!

Sorry, that was kind of off topic...

Lady Rose said...

An oral form of HPV that can lead to oral cancer and is transmittable via french kissing.

it doesn't get much worse than that. Sex is already filled with so much fear and death, did the universe have to take kissing away from us too???

Fortunately we have a handy vaccine that every girl aged 9 - 12 should be getting. Unfortunately, Catholics and many other Christian sects are narrowminded and their daughters will pay the price.

boo. the world sucks.

Meg said...

I opted out of that vaccine, because I'm on the upper end of the age bracket and monogamous. And I hate needles. And I lack a doctor.

But damn, if I had a teenage daughter she'd be first in line.

It's like not wearing a condom. Stupid. Why not take a simple precaution and avoid a life of, oh, I don't know...CANCER?!

Of course, I haven't read any of the anti-vaccine arguments, so in 10 years if we've zombified ourselves in the battle against HPV, I guess I'll eat my hat.

Wayne C. said...

I think you are making an assumption that the majority of this group of men have had sexual experiences with women. I suspect a large percentage of that 28% are virgins (college aged kids can be as young as 16 years old). Another chunk has probably had very few actual sexual experiences at all. In other words, a whole lot of stuff has yet to be tried. I laughed out loud when I read your joke about oral sex being a right not a privilege.

I wonder though if it would be as funny if it was said by a man. It is not my intent to impose political correctness on your blog (I like it the way it is), but I think these issues make for interesting discussion. :)

Lady Rose said...

Wayne, you are right, I was making an assumption though I think the bit about having 10 lifetime (or 5 recent) open mouthed kissing partners says something.

Though there is a fair share of virgins on college campuses I can't say that I ever knew too many virgins who had also have 5 recent open-mouthed kissing partners.

I mean, we're not talking about 12 year old kissing here. I think for most college aged men (although it is possible for a man to be 16 in college, I think we know that's not the majority of cases) open mouthed kissing leads to something else.

The heady days of heavy petting usually come to an end in high school and for most of those not hindered by a set of religous morals, sex is definitely on the menu in college.

But I would be interested to see a broader statistic comparing women and men and the performing of oral sex. Maybe my assumptions are all wrong!

Sterling Lynch said...

Great post, There is a huge and interesting can of worms here.

I love to give and receive oral sex and, in my experience, it is the women who are reluctant to receive, despite my very obvious desire to give. Either they think they don't like it or they are not comfortable letting a guy go in for a closer look. And I suspect both reasons are closely related.

I am quite happy to take the time to help a woman get to the psychological place where she is ready to receive and enjoy but it's not too hard to see how young guys wouldn't have the patience or wherewithal to do that -- especially given the little bundles of sexual anxiety young lovers often are.

Also, it occurs to me, many folks see oral sex as a submissive act and that may play a role in men and women not encouraging men to give oral sex regularly.

I'm not convinced skill in bed plays a huge roll in status assignment because if the guy is in the lady's bed she usually already thinks pretty highly of him. But I will continue to think about it Of course, probably best to ask the ladies directly.

So ladies, if you liked a guy, but heard he was bad in bed, would that lower him in your esteem?

Lady Rose said...

It's so funny to me that people could see oral sex as a submissive act. How much more in control of a guy can you be then when you have his dick in your mouth?

But, alas, I have fallen into the trap of assuming everyone is like me. I just assume that most women are into recieving because, well, because it's freaking awesome.

I guess that being bad in bed is more phase 2 rejection material. Whereas your tribal selection criteria is more about the first impression. It's difficult to know for certain whether someone is truly bad until you've experienced them yourselves. Some people just don't click.