Saturday, April 03, 2010

Dream Sequence

I have this recurring dream where I'm standing in the middle of a crowded room. It's frequently a party or theatre lobby...some sort of social situation in a large, crowded space. Various encounters may happen in the dream. People float in and out and varying levels of interaction occur.

The specific recurring bit is that I end up standing next to a boy. It's frequently a boy I like in the dream. There is always a reason why said boy and I shouldn't be interacting but the reason isn't clear. We end up standing very close to each other and our pinkie fingers link together. Then someone else will come up and I will break away and walk off. The whole moment feels very intense.

Why is this interesting you may be asking? Well, you might just think that recurring dreams are interesting. I certainly do. What causes dreams and whether or not they have any meaning is a bit of a mystery to me. But recurring dreams seem particularly weird. Why would your brain fire the same sequence of images to you over and over?

In this case it's interesting to me because I was recently reading a journal I kept from high school and I discovered that said dream scenario had actually happened to me in real life. There was a boy I liked. And this boy seemed to like me. Our social groups were not friendly and dating would have been...awkward, at best. We had several 'encounters', one of which was an odd moment where we were waiting in a press of people to vote in a school election. We were standing very close to each other and our pinkie fingers linked. I gave him a surprised look, someone squeezed in to talk to him, I pulled away into the crowd.

I had totally forgotten about this until I unearthed the recount in my journal. My brain has reproduced this scenario in my dreams dozens of times over the last 15 years.

I mean, WTF brain? Was that really a seminal moment in my life? Is there some message I'm missing about overcoming obstacles or feeling free to be myself? And if you have a message, brain, could you please just deliver it in a more straightforward fashion?


Sterling Lynch said...

What a great story! I love brains! They are so freaking cool. Journals are helpful too! :)

Meg said...

dude. I think you should seek out this guy from your past and ask him w.t.f? Why is he haunting your dreams? Face that crazy head on!

Lady Rose said...

And I totally would seek him out. Except he committed a rather serious crime a few years ago and is now in some sort of mental institution.

true story.

Sterling Lynch said...

After reading Meg's comment, I was going to say "OMG! Sounds like a movie!"

After reading your reply, LR, I have to say it totally sounds like a movie. Unfortunately, it now sounds kind of like a scary one...!